Update Sept. 27 2020
"TILL THERE IS HUGH" - parody lyric by Fred Landau.
Thanks to Sheree Sano for her vocal and the video editing.
Parody about the Music Man billboard - for social distance era, workers in nearby hotels and eateries pray for Broadway to come back with all the tourist money and customers. People don't go out to have dinner as part of watching Netflix, after all.
This video is at https://youtu.be/H6p1lzm6Rdc
With a need to re-think where containment was beginning of September
As re-open neared full swing, for better or worse, we see: Better not
OCT 2020: RE-OPEN THEN PULL BACK -
Parody Lyrics- Fred Landau Vocals MJ McAleesejergins, KJ McAleesejergins, Carla Loy Song. Vid/arr Scott Arcangel.
Parodies That's Entertainment- sung by MJ, You're So Vain- sung by Carla, Rainbow Connection sung by KJ, We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together- sung by Carla, Don't Sleep in the Subway- sung by MJ, Your Smiling Face- sung by KJ
A NYC actor in May 2020, while making masks (to "Make "Em Masks," of course) channels socially distant parodies of Rose in "Gypsy," Joanne in "Company," Lois Lane in "Kiss Me Kate" & winds up still at "Home."
Asking the musical question:
Doesn't 6 feet apart beat 6 feet under?
"With My Friend Killing Time"
“Lotta Gloves” - parody of Lotta Love
Housebound take: Send In the Pounds for this "
Thanks to Clare Cooper for this link to
her song "Bed At the End of the Road"
These are called "Quarantunes" and I found out about these because Stephanie Bianchi, the lead singer in this genius duo, is a music teacher and music therapist who worked with the (now grown) kids of a friend from across the hall in the school dorms.
Parody of "Time After Time"
Parody of "Let It Be"
Parody of "Summer Breeze"
Parody of "Hotel California"
Parody of "Total Eclipse of the Heart"
Will theater have to adjust with revisals that takes the new NYC into account ?
From a socially distant parody "MY FAR LADY" - In "I've Sewn a Costume For Your Face," the "flower girl" is given a mask sewn from flowers at a moment when she's tired of staying in.
Anyone who would be willing to have their own parody lyric or any musical YouTube link (funny or feel-good) included, just send ithe lyric or link to me FJL1960@aol.com
Starfighter Onstage LLC - no money of any kind involved in this project. and of course, the LLC owns nothing.
(Anything off-color or non-PC, feel free to send those: we can make a separate location for those.)
. [inspired by the NYT article on inspiring reaction to adversity by the Are Nova leader, as related in the Times]
Dedicated to the idea that while laughing and singing never makes a problem go away, they can improve your frame of mind and could make you better able to deal wih the problem. (the theme behind "Whistle A Happy Tune" or "Put on a Happy Face")
From the real Nicolette Larson classic,
the lyric that "inspired" this gallows humor:
"You know I need relating, not solitude"
Tune of “Lotta Love”
It’s gonna take a lotta gloves
To keep us safe from fear
It’s gonna take a lotta gloves
But one thing’s really clear.
Though you may find this surprising
And think this can’t be so:
If you need sanitizing
Supplies are low.
It’s gonna take a lotta gloves
To get us through a plague
It’s gonna take a lotta gloves
So let’s not be too vague.
That if you’ve been out there dawdlin’
And don’t even have Purell
Now I hope this isn’t maudlin
But it’s been swell.
Gotta lotta gloves.
Mayor de Blasio was encouraging people to "avoid crowded subway trains."
For real? Like we seek out crowded trains?
For real? Like we seek out crowded trains?
Tune of “Don't Sleep in the Subway”
You had a rough snooze
Then you turned on the news
And you wished you could work from your bed, dear
- (Whooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh)
Bill gave some advice
And it sounded real nice
And you process his words in your head, dear
You think “Should I have asked to work on Skype?”
You hear Bill as you give your card a swipe:
“Don’t breathe on the subway, people
Don’t get on a crowded train.
Don’t breathe on the subway, people
An empty train
Will come along real soon”
Now Bill’s refrain
Suggests that loon can’t be sane.
(ah, ah, ah)
Don’t breathe on the subway, people…
Maybe Broadway will have to adapt with smaller, even richer, audiences spread out like at the White House briefings, each performance 30 seats at $20,000. So just as shows were recently rewritten for inclusion, new versions for exclusion and the super-elitist audience. From "Don't Even Think About Kissing Me, Kate!"
Tune of “Always True To You In My Fashion”
If you need to ventilate,
Here’s the wait we estimate
Here’s the wait we estimate
At this rate, you’d have to wait
At least a day.
At least a day.
But this always has been true when we need to ration
Yes, there’s always some for you, darlings, if you pay!
Getting healthy, some may cite,
Is no priv’lege, it's a right.
Is no priv’lege, it's a right.
But that right, to be polite,
Is not in play.
Is not in play.
But this always has been true when we need to ration
Yes, there’s always some for you, darlings, if you pay.
It’s tradition that we shall
Use this age-old rationale:
When we ration here,
No compassion, dear -
No way!
No way!
Since this always has been true when we need to ration
Yes, there’s always some for you -
Darlings, if you pay!
On closing playgrounds:
It's very likely that the "they" that didn't maintain the six foot distance are not the same families and people who are the "they" that
pay the price. If someone was dealing in the park, would they remove the lawbreakers or shut the park to everyone?
It's very likely that the "they" that didn't maintain the six foot distance are not the same families and people who are the "they" that
pay the price. If someone was dealing in the park, would they remove the lawbreakers or shut the park to everyone?
Tune of “Him” (Rupert Holmes classic)
Over in the playground
There are folks we never met.
They act like fools
They know the rules
Pretend like they forget.
They ignore the guidelines
But here’s what we all should discuss:
Why should my kids suffer now-
When they’re them, and they’re not us.
Just them,
Them,
Them.
Them,
Them.
How about just dealing with them?
How about appealing to them?
And not punish me,
[Kid #1] And me -
[KId #2] And me -
We observed the rules to a T
We don’t even know them
As suffering arts organizations could only laugh rather than cry, but tried to get some money to the artists when possible
"Make 'Em Masks"-
Tune of “Make ‘Em Laugh”
Make 'em masks
Make 'em masks
Don’t you know everyone wants a mask?
And now each doc on YouTube shows us.
That can be done with no fuss!
Make a gross, make a case.
Give 'em out without touching your face
Oh, you can draw a line to track your loss on a graph
Inside you break down crying but it hurts less to laugh.
So as an extra bonus when you're paying your staff,
Make 'em masks.
Make 'em masks.
Make 'em masks.
Make 'em masks
Make 'em masks
Don’t you know everyone wants a mask?
The Veep says that’s what everyone says
But someone, go brief the Prez.
Give 'em work, fill their void.
They have fun when they’re un-unemployed.
Hey, you can just do nothing and keep germs spreading fast.
And more folks staying home may put the growth in the past
So never give them time to see their cash will not last.
Make 'em masks
Make 'em masks
Make 'em masks
Regarding the Cuomo for President 2020 fantasy.
Are we so anti-Trump that we look the other way and treat anyone who can oppose Trump like they're perfect. It's like smooth-talking Abenatti all over again when we were ready to elect him President - for months! (Rudy had rallied us effectively, too)
"Bad Finance"
tune of “Bad Romance” (Lady Gaga smash)
tune of “Bad Romance” (Lady Gaga smash)
(Cuo-oh-oh-oh-oh-mo)
He had real bad finance.
(Cuo-oh-oh-oh-oh-mo).
Had really bad finance.
(2x) Cuomo, uh, uh, oh
You tell others no.
But watch your own dough.
You’ve got bad finance.
He makes us feel good
He helps us get through.
But don’t forget about his bad finance.
(Dough-oh-oh-oh-oh)
That Trump suggests it
Don't mean it's not true
Smooth talkers sometimes give us bad finance.
(Cuo-oh-oh-oh-mo)
Had really bad finance.
The Apollo Theatre kept its doors open, in a virtual open mike night
Tune of “Sir Duke”- (Stevie Wonder’s feel-great classic)
The Apollo name will always be
The most reliable of music brands.
Here’s a streaming opportunity
So come and watch us once you’ve wash your hands
Though the virus came and shut our doors
It sure can’t shut us down.
And our house is beaming into yours,
With the newest acts in town.
We’ll be streaming all over!
You can see us all over, singing.
Did you think the show was over?
You can stream us all over, singing!
Speculating on whether the shows would have been liable if Broadway shows hadn't been stopped:
An idea: they could offer some token of empathy to the family that the audience member left behind.
tune of "Gee, Officer Krupke"
Our lawyers took a look-see.
Your brief has many flaws
Our show's not on the hook, see -
Not as we see the laws.
You say our cast was spitting
That's why you're in a hearse.
Golly Thespis, it was your own cherce.
Gosh, Middle class buyer
It's small recompense
But we'll send you free tickets to some future events.
And since you're deceased, then your heirs can come too.
Bye, Middle class buyer -
Thank YOU!
Thank YOU!
tune of "Together Wherever We Go"
Wherever we stay
Whatever we do
I'm right here with you - here together.
We stay where we are
It's working so far
Though you sit so far, we're together..
And when I am here and work, you work
And when I stand up and lurk, you lurk
But leaving six feet is now knee-jerk
When we lurk
Together.
And it's no surprise
As we sanitize
I look in your eyes and say wow -
I love you so, want your embrace
Hey, get your fingers off of your face
Together?
Whatever!
We're never together, for now.
Tune of “The Little Things You Do Together” from “Company”
It’s the things we like to do together.
Do together,
Do together.
Do together.
That promotes incubation-ship.
It’s hundreds in one place together
Crowded with no space together
Nearly face to face together
That bring viruses joy.
Producer types love to worry
But not a thought about wealth.
It’s sweet to feel when they worry,
They’re just concerned for our health.
Each night and matinée together.
Crowds that yell hooray together.
Droplets that we spray together.
That bring viruses joy.
(Uh huh. Air-kiss. Mm, hmm.)
Regarding "coughing into our elbows" - a new concept for lots of people
Tune of “Rainbow Connection”
There are not so many
Rules about elbows
They aren’t noticed that much,
Except when they’re hurting
Then we see the pharmacist
To get pills and ointments and such.
But now with articles
Warning of particles
Riding the train or the bus,
Please cough and sneeze in
Your elbow’s direction
To show that you care about us.
“Your face is very vulnerable to viruses and germs."
We became aware of how often we touched our face, when papers started giving us "tricks to help you stop touching it."
We became aware of how often we touched our face, when papers started giving us "tricks to help you stop touching it."
Tune of “Your Smiling Face” (James Taylor classic)
Whenever I see you touch your face
I have to cry and yell
Because I love you, yes I do.
'Cause when your hand goes too close to your nose
Or even near your mouth
Theres something about that, baby
Scares me so.
Isn’t it amazing a wayward sneeze
Is not okay?
With each microbe portal
We’re seeming more mortal every day, yeah.
(Though love’s immortal)
[chant to fadeout]
[chant to fadeout]
CDC tells me that you’re doing wrong, baby.
Whenever your hand gets near your face
Mike Pence is warning that you’re doing wrong, baby.
Whenever your hand gets near your face today
Trump has no clue that anything's wrong, oy vey
(la, la, la ,la, la)
Tune of “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together”
Ever since the first time that we met -
Online.
Online.
Life with you felt good as life can get -
So fine.
So fine.
But today we dare not go outside.
So let’s set the webcams up
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
I love you so much I could spit.
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
This plague is plaguing me, plaguing me
We are never ever ever
Making out together.
Making out together.
We are never ever ever
Making out together.
Your face, not with my face,
You’re at your place
Not with me.
Could be, we’re never ever ever ever -
Making out together.
tune of "Que Sera Sera"
When I put on the creepy mask
I asked my mother, how does it look?
Does it look pretty, does it look cool?
She said: Don't be a shnook.
Que sera, sera
Kid, fashion is not the key,
Pay heed to the C.D.C.
Que sera sera.
Playfully, to tune of “You’re So Vain”
You walked onto the Seven,
Just like every other day
Just like every other day
Then you strategically stood right near the door,
To make your switch for the A.
To make your switch for the A.
Though you looked real sharp and smelled real nice,
The others edged away
Who needs that spray
From your mouth when you’re coughing
From your mouth when you’re coughing
Mouth when you’re coughing
And -
It’s insane,
You don’t know that this song is about you.
Yes, it’s plain,
You think that we’re not singing about you
,
Don’t you, don’t you?
In "The Wiz" on Broadway, Dorothy asked the good Witch why she hadn't told her hours ago that she could just have clicked her heels three times, and none of this dangerous stuff had to happen. The good Witch looked around at all the actors and musicians and dancers and stagehands and said, "What? And put all these people out of work?"
tune of "Home"
When I think of home
It could be a place
Where I’m cooped up and grouchy.
But I’ll stay at home
Feel its warm embrace
‘Cause I hear Dr. Fauci.
Oh and if you’re listening,Prez
To what science says
And that smart Dr. Birx sure does agree.
Tell those six Governors that they
Should tell their states to stay
If not by choice, then maybe by decree?
Sitting here posting junk online is no catastrophe
Then his briefing comes on
It’s unreal, unreal, to me!
And this week,
Except to walk the dog, I’ll stay
Where scientists say,
A place I won’t mind
At home.
Tune of "That’s Entertainment” The Prez, who with each word he says Gives those docs on the stage some new shocks. As we plead for the thing that we need And that’s containment. Our Gov, who last fall got no love Gets applause, as we look past his flaws And we cope ‘cause he’s our only hope For that containment The fates of those states where they’re ditching the rules Will they be okay while we worry like fools? Hey, did we choose the wrong schools? Now tattooists have more potential, And manicures are “essential” With luck, folks just out for a buck Will observe their effect on the curve Keep it flat, so we know where we’re at We’re all in a stage A stage where the money fights containment
Recalling back before the seriousness had set in, before isolating started:
"Everyone" who did parodies was doing their own
"My Corona" to tune of "My Sharona,"
It was pretty much rebellious not to try at that time. And certainly the real song was never politically correct to begin with, and no one cared back then.
So this was a subway and office take - from when offices were still open.
Do not get close to me
On the C,
Close enough to smell my breath -
Corona
It is not a mystery
On the E
Subway poles scare us to death -
Corona
At the office please,
Wipe the keys
Any time you type..
Don’t give up a chance
At romance
Have a date on Skype.
Oh my, oh my, oh!
Oh my, oh my - Coroina!
My, my! Oh my! Corona!
No comments:
Post a Comment